By Sharon Gordon
Johannesburg - May is Masturbation Month. I know it’s the last weekend in May and I should have told you earlier, but I thought I’d remind you that it is good for you all year round. With winter firmly established it’s a good way to keep your kit on but still have fabulous orgasms.
I’m also seeing posts about how you can’t get to heaven if you masturbate which naturally blows my mind! I keep wondering how in the 21st century we are still stuck with this nonsense. PLEASE read the section in the Bible that allegedly deals with the issue and then let’s debate what the sin of Onan really was. If you’re interested, it can be found in Genesis 38.
Back to Masturbation Month and why I believe it is an important part of sexual and mental health. I would also much rather have my sons and daughters masturbate than have sex with someone when they’re not ready.
Let’s start with busting some myths. I’ve already mentioned the alleged sin. Absolute hogwash!
Next, it ruins intimacy with your partner. If you have a partner who is threatened by you exploring your own needs and pleasure, then maybe. The question you should be asking yourself is – Why? And is this the right partner for me?
So many people thing women don’t or shouldn’t masturbate and just here we step into the pleasure gap debate. And getting back to the alleged sin aforementioned, women do not spill seed! Women are simply shamed more for touching themselves and enjoying pleasure, which may prevent them from masturbating. I would argue that once women get over their guilt about pleasure, they can explore a whole new world and enjoy orgasm and sex more fully.
Another mad myth is that only single people masturbate. We often hear it in the Lola Montez store – I don’t need a vibrator I have a partner. Really? You both have similar libidos. Neither of you explore your pleasure on your own. And your partner never gets to watch? You’re really missing out.
My next favourite myth is that you only have so many orgasms in you and so you need to save them because it could be bad for your health. To the contrary, sex, orgasm and masturbation are actually good for you.
I have 8 good reasons why I believe we should all masturbate.
Self-awareness and emotional release – touching yourself is a form of self-care. You will be able to identify and connect with your own desires, emotions and sensuality. It provides you with a safe space to release emotions, fostering emotional wellness and self-connection.
Improved sleep quality. We all need to sleep better. Sleep is essential for our sanity. Self-pleasure promotes relaxation, and the release of endorphins contributes to better sleep. It will help you unwind before bed and release the day’s tension.
Boost your self-esteem. Through self-pleasure you can explore your body. Learn about your unique desire and embrace your sexuality. This in turn fosters self-acceptance, boosts self-esteem and enhances body confidence.
Stress reduction and relaxation. We’ve already mentioned how it can help you sleep. Engaging in self-pleasure can help activate the relaxation response, reducing stress hormone levels such as cortisol. It provides a healthy and enjoyable way to relax, unwind and let go of our daily stressors.
Hormonal balance – Self pleasure releases our inner pharmacy. It triggers the release of oxytocin, dopamine and other hormones associated with well being and pleasure. The hormonal balance can positively impact mood and reduce PMS symptoms.
Pain relief. Because of the release of endorphins during self-pleasure, these act as natural pain killers. They can help alleviate a headache, Period pains and other discomfort. It can serve as a natural, non-chemical method of pain relief.
Muscle conditioning – Engaging in self-pleasure usually involves rhythmic contractions of the pelvic floor muscles. Regular exercising these muscles can help strengthen them leading to better bladder control and stronger orgasms improving overall sexual health.
Increased blood flow. Self-pleasure increases blood circulation to the genital area, which can enhance sensitivity and arousal contributing to a better sexual experience.
Feeling better about myself and increasing my sexual health because I’m brave enough to masturbate leaves me with no doubt about why we should all try a bit of self-pleasure now and then.
A vibrator helps the process along and as you know by now at Lola Montez, we’ll give you all the advise you need on how to start and what to buy. Happy playing and remember that you should experience pleasure all year round – not just in May.