Bride-to-be would rather elope than deal with monster-in-law

A bride-to-be wants to elope instead of dealing with her future mother-in-law. Picture: Pexels Alisa

A bride-to-be wants to elope instead of dealing with her future mother-in-law. Picture: Pexels Alisa

Published Jan 16, 2024


You know a mother-in-law is more of a monster-in-law when a bride-to-be would rather elope than have to deal with her.

“I (f35) and fiancé (m30) are considering cancelling our wedding and eloping instead because of MIL,” wrote a Reddit user on the app’s popular ‘AmItheAssh*le’ forum.

The anonymous bride-to-be explains that her MIL has never tried to have a positive relationship with her. She ensures that she is not included in conversations, belittles her achievements and talks down to her.

“Things escalated when I was planning my fiancé’s 30th. MIL fought me on every detail and accused me of not knowing my fiancé at all. (I planned a golf weekend away for him and his family) he loves golf,” wrote the Reddit user.

“Fiancé confronted MIL and asked why she doesn’t like me? MIL admitted she doesn’t like me. Doesn’t like my partner driving me to his family events, didn’t like it took me a month to find employment when I moved to a different town to be with fiancé.

“Fiancé receives calls and texts from MIL daily. If he doesn’t respond, she blames me. Fiance told her if she doesn't stop this behaviour toward me he will no longer speak with her,” she added.

She continued to share an incident from her fiance’s brother’s wedding.

“Wedding day arrives and we were to be at the venue at 4pm. Five minutes to 2pm fiance; receives a call from MIL saying the family photo shoot is in 5 minutes. We hadn't been told of a family photo shoot. MIL demands we arrive at 2pm for it.

“We frantically get ready and arrived at the house where the wedding was. There was never a photo shoot planned. MIL comes out in her pyjamas and tries to hand me suit shirts to iron. I refused.

“MIL snaps at me asking where my son is. He was never coming. He’s at the hotel. MIL continues stating everyone thought he would be there. I responded he was never coming and we RSVP just us. She has been told multiple times he wasn’t coming.”

She shared that after the ceremony was over, guests started asking her where was her son.

“I don’t even know these people’s names. I tell them he's at the hotel. Looks of disgust are thrown at me. My new friends stopped talking to me. I realised these people were being told my son was at the hotel but not telling them how old he is (teenager). The wedding was a place of ridicule and disgust on me.”

The bride-to-be continued to relay another incident that took place on Christmas Day at her MIL’s house.

“Her family scurry away from me on arrival, refusing to hug or greet me. One man, whom I had met once 2 years ago, aggressively accused me of leaving my son alone on Christmas Day. (Son was at father's place this year). The rumour has continued and now not only does the MIL hate me, so do her family.”

Now her fiancé wants to cancel the wedding and elope.

“Fiancé is demanding I speak with MIL one last time in order for him to cut her off,” she concluded.

She posed the following question to Redditors: “AITA for not wanting to confront MIL and for cancelling the wedding?”

“NTA ELOPE! It will be so fun! Use the funds to go somewhere magical, get the dress off your dreams (if that’s important to you), take the best photos, eat the best food, have the time of your life. If they already hate you, you’ve got nothing to lose! Doooo ittttt,” responded one user.

Another agreed saying: “NTA. At least your fiancé is on your side. Elope, get married and live well.”

“NTA. But don't cancel the wedding if a wedding is what you and your fiancé want. If you do have a wedding, only invite the people that support both of you. Don't invite anyone who doesn't support both of you. If that means, no MIL, she'll just have to live with the consequences of her actions,” commented a third.

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